(Written in 2002 – illustrated using photo shop)
When I was still working at a chemical laboratory, my employer was downsizing to 500 less workers, and even when I was not one of those being “let go,” I was very scared. I suddenly came down with “occupational” asthma. I coughed non-stop, had breathing problems, and couldn’t do my work because of the chemicals. I was afraid that I was going to lose my job.
I was taken out of my routine lab work to rewrite laboratory procedures. So, for four months, I shared an office with Monica, our lab clerk. Initially, I was thankful that my desk was close to the window, until I saw that my outside view was only a brick wall of the adjacent building. Hence, my picture window wasn’t a big thrill for me at all…….until one day.
It was a gloomy Monday morning. I sat idly, gazing at the window – my mood reflecting the weather outside. I had just lost my husband Edwin to cancer, and my world was turned upside down. What else can go wrong with my life? Life isn’t fair at all. That morning my mind was full of questions and conclusions. However, I was thankful for I’ve been blessed with two wonderful sons.
As I blankly stared at the window assessing my life, I saw a most unusual sight. On the glass, a spider was chasing a fly. The devourer was slightly bigger than its prey, and it probably was savoring and smacking its gums in delight.
“This is an easy meal for me,” the spider probably thought.
On the other hand, the fly probably was frozen with fear, seeing its devourer eye to eye, that it forgot to “fly” out of the situation. So, it crept about slowly. But everywhere it moved to, the unrelenting enemy was right there on its front.
The chase continued. I tried timing it. Every few minutes, the spider would stop chasing, as if it was tired. And the fly would stop moving also. But after a few seconds, the chase continued. It was a slow chase. I can compare it to two small children with the chaser trying to trap the other.
I was amused as I watched the long struggle. I called Monica over, and we both laughed as we watched. Finally, the spider gave up and crawled to the other side of the glass window. The fly just sat there for a long time, probably still terrified, wondering if the spider was coming back. It (fly) probably thought its end had come while the chase was going on. After a while, I looked at the window again and the fly was gone.
Why did we find it amusing? It was because it was a “No Win” situation for the chaser anyway, for in between the spider and the fly was the glass of the window.
After what I had just witnessed, I looked at my life again. Just like the fly, I may allow life’s uncertainties and tragedies keep me afraid forever that I’d forget to live again. I can continue to feel horrible and have a lot of self-pity, or I can rise above my misery. So right there and then, I decided, I wasn’t going to allow “it” to ruin me anymore. I decided to get on with my life. There is this Higher Power I have entrusted my life to. Just like the glass that kept the fly away from the reach of the spider, this higher power is my protector. To Christians, this Higher Power is God.
“The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?” Psalms 27:1
Note: I got well after I was taken out of the chemical lab but as soon I was sent back, my asthma flared up again. I was one of the 500 workers who were “let go” except I was given monthly FULL PAY, health insurance and other benefits. I was able to retire 9 years early – and was considered a regular employee, except I did not go to work anymore. I worked at home doing our 2 volunteer ministries (Adopt a Minister International and Help the Needy, Inc.) full time. And because I NO longer worked with chemicals, I NO longer have my “occupational” asthma. And so, I praise God!
In 2003, I asked God to send me help for my volunteer work for Him. Then I started having dreams where I saw someone getting married. I also dreamed about a person with short hair playing the piano. On March 2003, Mary Grace (one-handed pianist from Bacolod) came knocking at my Denham Springs door. Three days later, JR Moore from West VA, appeared at my Denham Springs door. We three are complete strangers that God had put together to do our volunteer work for Him. JR and I got married on June 7, 2003 and Mary Grace played the wedding march during our wedding. Twenty one years later, we 3 are still working our ministries for Jesus. God has been so good. To God be the glory!